Rhaen Likes Imagery Sometimes
Jan. 29th, 2011 09:54![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rhaenI wrote this somewhere around spring 2008. I was really happy at this point in time, flush with euphoria and happy feelings (which were summarily crushed later). So I started writing a story about it. This was ostensibly an exploration of imagery on my part, with plot being more or less nonexistant. I don't even like to re-read it, being that it's from a time in my past when I was at my worst, so I can only imagine how it would hold up to true literary critique (it wouldn't). That being said, it's not doing anything sitting on my hard drive, so I might as well post it. Like Two-Bits, this too is a rough draft, but unlike Two-Bits, probably won't be explored any further.
Untitled
(3/2008)
The world twisted about him, the warm wind cradling his body as he twisted and turned in the breeze. Twilight fell around the appaloosa, and he ran with the spirits of nature, pirouetting along the dusty path. Dry green weeds and grass lined the hard-packed dirt trail, their husks whistling against each other, a whisper of the world to the young equine. The sun had sunk behind the far off foothills, and the horizon grew a deep purple, pinpricks of starlight piercing the sky as night fell. The moon had risen, silvery and bright, and soont ook the sun's place in illumnating the praeirie that stretched to the ends of the earth. The breeze was dry, and warm, it caressed his velvety grey skin and his satin, charcoal fur as his hooves pounded down the path, without destination or direction. His movements seemed dictated by the rustling wind about him, and his face was alight with glee, eyes twinkling a clear blue in the moon's light. Rhaen's heart pounded in his chest, almost in time with his hoof-falls, a unversal tempo, his teenage mind as free as the jetstreams that carried the few whisps of couds through the darkening sky. His eyes never left the heavens, and as he galloped the way their deep violet became an unending blue, his body felt electrified, filled with energy as his sapphire hair whipped behind him- it would blend into the sky were it not for the way the moon's glow caused it to shimmer and sparkle. The thuds of his silver-shoed hooves slowed to a stop, trampling in the dust as he paused to take a breath, hands on knees as he bent over to suck in the sweet, musky scent of autumn. The tall grasslands guarding that path had yet to fully dry out, and their stalks stood soft and green, bending and twisting in the zephyr that whisked its way across his plains. A gentle bluegrass provided a foundation, and with a loud grunt, the heavy equine sprawled over onto the ground, crashing between the tall grass and came to rest upon his back. His long mane cascaded all around him, whispering to the taller stalks as a warm breeze flitted through the field. His huffs and puffs quickly subsided, and with a throaty nicker, the stallion relaxed, letting his arms fall limpy to either side. His fingers explored through the blades of grass as the wind whipped over his fur, and taking another deep breath, he filled himself with natures's beauty. His senses were electrified, and his body writhed in the bedding, his eyes almost closing, eyelids fluttering as he gazed up into the sky. The wind rippled through his loose clothing, caressing the naked fur of his legs and belly and Rhaen gave a shudder of ecstasy, crying joyously to the heavens. He could lay for no longer, though, and regretfully he sprung up, having caught his second wind. Starting out slowly, he began to trot down the uneven path again before breaking back into an easy gallop- as easy as an overweight horsie could. He didn't perspire, despite his weight, and the rushing of the wind over the curves of his body kept him cool as he made his way down the winding trail, until he came over the crest of a hill. Once more Rhaen paused, but this time he gasped for breath on a small hill, overlooking a small farm. The late evening's glow cast final streaks of purple light on a small windmill, and the moonlight lit the rest of the tiny farm's buildings- a farmhouse, corralls, and two tiny but well kept farmhouses. The buildings were old, but not neglected, and their proud paint glistened in the full moon, and at a slower pace the stallion headed in their direction. Cutting off of the trail, Rhaen carefull began to make his way through the whistling thrush to an aging fence. He hopped the wooden planks with not too much difficulty, though his big rump hung in the air a moment before he finally toppled over onto clean-cut sod. Nickering, he picked himself up and dusted the blades of grass off his dark jeans, smoothing out his black collared and buttoned shirt. Carefully and as silently as he could, the colt snuck across the lawn to the closer of the two farmhouses, where a window glowed a warm anbaric yellow.
There you have it! You can tell how old the writing is because of the lack of paragraphs. :| My contemporary style is to make constant use of paragraph breaks, to pace the writing better. You can also probably see the Furcadian hardcore-RP tics that plagued my writing for years. Finally, this also involves my old fursona, who was eaten by zombies.
Untitled
(3/2008)
The world twisted about him, the warm wind cradling his body as he twisted and turned in the breeze. Twilight fell around the appaloosa, and he ran with the spirits of nature, pirouetting along the dusty path. Dry green weeds and grass lined the hard-packed dirt trail, their husks whistling against each other, a whisper of the world to the young equine. The sun had sunk behind the far off foothills, and the horizon grew a deep purple, pinpricks of starlight piercing the sky as night fell. The moon had risen, silvery and bright, and soont ook the sun's place in illumnating the praeirie that stretched to the ends of the earth. The breeze was dry, and warm, it caressed his velvety grey skin and his satin, charcoal fur as his hooves pounded down the path, without destination or direction. His movements seemed dictated by the rustling wind about him, and his face was alight with glee, eyes twinkling a clear blue in the moon's light. Rhaen's heart pounded in his chest, almost in time with his hoof-falls, a unversal tempo, his teenage mind as free as the jetstreams that carried the few whisps of couds through the darkening sky. His eyes never left the heavens, and as he galloped the way their deep violet became an unending blue, his body felt electrified, filled with energy as his sapphire hair whipped behind him- it would blend into the sky were it not for the way the moon's glow caused it to shimmer and sparkle. The thuds of his silver-shoed hooves slowed to a stop, trampling in the dust as he paused to take a breath, hands on knees as he bent over to suck in the sweet, musky scent of autumn. The tall grasslands guarding that path had yet to fully dry out, and their stalks stood soft and green, bending and twisting in the zephyr that whisked its way across his plains. A gentle bluegrass provided a foundation, and with a loud grunt, the heavy equine sprawled over onto the ground, crashing between the tall grass and came to rest upon his back. His long mane cascaded all around him, whispering to the taller stalks as a warm breeze flitted through the field. His huffs and puffs quickly subsided, and with a throaty nicker, the stallion relaxed, letting his arms fall limpy to either side. His fingers explored through the blades of grass as the wind whipped over his fur, and taking another deep breath, he filled himself with natures's beauty. His senses were electrified, and his body writhed in the bedding, his eyes almost closing, eyelids fluttering as he gazed up into the sky. The wind rippled through his loose clothing, caressing the naked fur of his legs and belly and Rhaen gave a shudder of ecstasy, crying joyously to the heavens. He could lay for no longer, though, and regretfully he sprung up, having caught his second wind. Starting out slowly, he began to trot down the uneven path again before breaking back into an easy gallop- as easy as an overweight horsie could. He didn't perspire, despite his weight, and the rushing of the wind over the curves of his body kept him cool as he made his way down the winding trail, until he came over the crest of a hill. Once more Rhaen paused, but this time he gasped for breath on a small hill, overlooking a small farm. The late evening's glow cast final streaks of purple light on a small windmill, and the moonlight lit the rest of the tiny farm's buildings- a farmhouse, corralls, and two tiny but well kept farmhouses. The buildings were old, but not neglected, and their proud paint glistened in the full moon, and at a slower pace the stallion headed in their direction. Cutting off of the trail, Rhaen carefull began to make his way through the whistling thrush to an aging fence. He hopped the wooden planks with not too much difficulty, though his big rump hung in the air a moment before he finally toppled over onto clean-cut sod. Nickering, he picked himself up and dusted the blades of grass off his dark jeans, smoothing out his black collared and buttoned shirt. Carefully and as silently as he could, the colt snuck across the lawn to the closer of the two farmhouses, where a window glowed a warm anbaric yellow.
There you have it! You can tell how old the writing is because of the lack of paragraphs. :| My contemporary style is to make constant use of paragraph breaks, to pace the writing better. You can also probably see the Furcadian hardcore-RP tics that plagued my writing for years. Finally, this also involves my old fursona, who was eaten by zombies.
